Our journey towards parenthood did not begin unlike the typical married couple who decided they would like to start a family. We simply just started “trying.”
After one year of attempting to conceive on our own, Mandi was referred to a fertility specialist by her OB. Tests were conducted and many vials of blood were drawn. Afterward, we were placed in the “unexplained infertility” category. We were told that the single factor which might be most inhibiting our chances of conception was that Mandi had an FSH level of 12. This is on the high end for a woman of her age, but we were also told that it did not mean that we would not be able to become pregnant. Next was the recommended rounds of treatment…3-4 menstrual cycles augmented with IUI’s and Clomid, a fertility hormone. Several months and four failed IUI attempts later, we decided to get a second opinion.
Our new fertility specialist did things a bit differently. We were able to sit down, face to face, with the new doctor, talk expressly about our concerns, ask him questions, and listen to his responses. The warmth of this visit was a welcome change from the purely clinical air of our former specialist. During this same visit, tests were performed and more vials of blood were drawn.
A week later, we received a call from the doctor himself. He informed us that Mandi has a very, very diminished ovarian reserve (not a lot of eggs left, and possibly not quality eggs left). He let us know that we would either have to jump into a heavily medicated IVF procedure, with only a slim chance of success, or move on to an egg donor and give IUI’s a chance again. After hearing the sad truth of the matter, we had to process the inevitability of our situation: we were unlikely to conceive on our own. Over this nearly two-year long experience, there have been many tears, lots of stress, and occasional flashes of hope. However, nothing compared to the absolute feeling of loss and longing for our biological child that we are unlikely to ever know.
Sometime later, after some considerable soul-searching, clarity came to us. We are meant to ADOPT! We know that there is a child out there waiting for us; one who needs loving parents as much as we want to be loving parents. We have never felt so confident about anything (except for how we feel about one another).
So, we are now in the process of adopting… We are excited, nervous, anxious, and relieved to know our baby is on its way, and we wanted all of our family and friends to be aware of our journey. We are fully confident of our decision to adopt and can not wait to introduce our baby to all of you in the near future!
Jason & Mandi Gray